Never Have I Ever
by Temporal Austenite
Summary: I have taken Jareth and Erik from their normal, everyday lives, and they will be forced to play games-like Never Have I Ever. Rated K for mild swears and mild violence. Read and Review, please!


**Disclaimer: I do not own Jareth or Erik. While willing to kidnap them for miscellaneous purposes, I do not have any real control over them. They were created by Leroux and Henson, the great masters.**

I sat there, my feet on the table, leaning backwards in my chair. I swung my feet down reluctantly when a masked man and a man with spiked hair entered the room. They did not talk to each other, and glanced sideways at the other, a (most-likely earned) look of total mistrust and suspicion.

I gestured widely to the other two chairs at the white circle of a table, "Sit down. Please."

"Where are we?"

"That is for me to know and you to find out. I trust you've been introduced to one another?"

The one in the mask shook his head, glaring at me and the other man.

"Sit, I insist!" When they had both taken a seat, I smiled, "Erik, this is Jareth. Jareth, Erik."

"And who are you?" Erik asked.

"Goblindreamer, Mr. Phantom-"

"YOU DREAM OF GOBLINS?"

"No, Sire. Not often, and when I do, I'm sure that I will never survive."

"Why are we here?" Erik asked, cutting off Jareth as he opened his mouth.

"I don't expect you get much fun in your everyday lives, so I've decided to teach you a few games."

"Like what?"

"Well, to start with, We are going to play Never Have I Ever. Either of you played before?"

They both slowly shook their heads, so I held up my hands. "Hold your hands like this. The goal of the game is to be the person with the most fingers left up. The more minor goal is to make another person lose. You lose a finger when some one Never have I ever, and it's something you have done. Got it?"

They held up their hands, albeit reluctantly. "Okay, I'll start." I glanced mischievously between the two of them. "Never have I ever had an unrequited love."

They both placed a finger down, glaring at me. "Kay. Your turn Erik!"

Apparently he couldn't come up with something to knock down one of my fingers, so he glared at Jareth and announced, "Never have I ever worn spiked hair!"

Jareth slowly put a finger down, a look of total hatred burning though his mismatched eyes over towards Erik. "Never have I ever worn a plain white half face mask."

"Damn, you're good at this game," I muttered, placing my thumb down. "kay…Never have I ever taken my object of affection away from a task to sing amazingly romantic songs at."

They both looked like they were going to swear at me. "Erik?" I prompted.

"Never have I ever Worn Make-up!"

Jareth glared at him, but I laughed. Jareth then glared at me, but unable to think of anything to knock me off said, "Never have I ever not been invited to a party!"

Erik kicked him under the table so I decided to quickly defuse the situation, "Never have I ever been to a masked ball."

They both looked insulted, then placed a hand down. I smiled widely as Erik took the tactic of 'Let's beat up Jareth because he looks funny'. "Never have I ever worn tight pants!"

When we put down our fingers, Erik smiled maliciously at Jareth. "Your turn."

"Never have I ever not been good looking."

I looked between them. "Do I put a finger down?"

"Compared to scarface there, you're an angel." Jareth replied.

"I'll take that as a no." I smiled, "Never have I ever kissed/been kissed by a girl."

They both looked surprised at my innovation, but placed down their fingers. Erik tried again, attempting to knock me out further, "Never have I ever played with small children."

"Really?" Jareth asked, as we both placed down a finger, "Pitiful creature of darkness."

This statement immediately launched Erik into a fit of hysterics, prompting Jareth to smile and say, "Never have I ever launched into a fit of hysterics because someone else said something that my love said."

Erik hit Jareth, spawning a fist fight and my "Never have I ever had a fist fight over Never have I ever."

They both slowly realized that They both only had one finger left, despite the fact that Jareth's one finger was rather provoking, they both turned on me with, "Never have I ever been a girl," and Jareth's rather inventive, "Never have I ever forced people to play never have I ever."

I sighed and rolled my eyes at them, "Never have I ever been in love with a girl several years younger than me with brown hair."

They both begrudgingly placed their fingers down. "Now, where are we?"

"Shush. I need to think of another game…"

_**Read and review please! If you review you will get a cookie!**_

_**You will get a brownie or cupcake if you come up with a game to play with them! I'd love to play apples to apples, but alas, too few players for a good game…**_

This did not happen to Jareth in the movie, I know, but it only stands to reason.


End file.
